You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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