Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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