So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Randomize
