I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
