I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Randomize
