Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
