it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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