Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
