His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
This show inspires me to have sex in space
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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