I wish I could punch you in the face.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
