Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
