her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
