So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
