Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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