Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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