dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I AM VODKA MAN
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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