i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
