sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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