i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
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