Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Randomize
