you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize