Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
