oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
