he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
