Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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