would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
