She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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