i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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