I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
