This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize