So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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