sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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