Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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