You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.