Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
