I just made out with a guy for $7.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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