I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize