My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Randomize