When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
