Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
