So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize