Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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