If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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