I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
