I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
