i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"