Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
