The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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