We're like a lot better than the average bears
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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