I got chris browned last night
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
You know, be my cock's hype man.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
